i need something to change.
i don't know what's going on..

I haven't been happy and I think its obvious.. Well maybe not obvious, but people can see that I'm not myself. After talking a lot with my best friend, most of it is resolved..


thanks for helping me with my addiction.
i want to stay pure for Christ.



you are my best friend. my first true best friend .i am glad i met you last year. i can't believe we have known each other for a year now. i want to thank you for all oyu have done for me especially since you were able to develop enough trust with me for me to let you into the most intimate aspect of my life. i can never thank you enough. i love you best friend. thank you helping me agsint temptation. and being there for me. sleep tight.

i thank God for letting me take 1 step forward and hate the world that I'm always taking 3 steps back.

internal turmoil..

thank God its Friday

it is too hot to do anything.. nothing seems right anymore.. I've been listening to other people's advice and not my own. I want to know what is it that I think and not of what others may think. I know I am capable of having my own opinion, and of course, I should know myself better than others. Just some of my thoughts for now.

Let Lose

I have never been so disappointed in this world.. or is it in myself. Everyone told me that no one knows me is because I don't bother letting anyone into myself. Before, I let everyone in, told them everything, left my scar'd, broken in pieces. I chose to let a few individuals into my life again, and I now don't know if they're the right individuals. I have never been so hurt by those words. Maybe this is in my head. Nothing should change regardless what happens, really theres no reason too. Why would things be different? Everyday I fight this battle with myself, I know I'll end up losing because I can't take it anymore. What happens if the person i trust and love the most. Won't accept me if I was that way? Honestly, I dont know what I is. I have had this thought since the 9th grade. Maybe it is I who won't accept the truth. Accept. Denied. Love. Trust. Honesty.

You accepted to be my best friend. I didn't force you. You should be able to love me no whatever and things should not change no matter what.

Only time will tell..

on a little note, I hope I stop coughing =[

the fsh

i listen to this every morning since i started praying again.. thanks to the best friend.

best friend & i