This has been one of the most difficult weekend that i have had in a while. I am in my mind trying to rebuild this broken relationship and at the same time start this new relationship. I dont know what i should put my energy towards. I cant believe i feel like this. Dont get me wrong, i have been feeling like this for a while. People say its just one of those things thats just in my mind. But i would like to believe otherwise. It may be more. It might be less. I do know that i an tired of this. I am hurting inside. And i dont know how much more i can take of this. I looked towards this weekend to fix something when that didnt occur and i feel that the exact opposite happened. I dont think i should feel guilty for feeling the way i feel. I still have that doubt thats been there since the beginning. I hope that something changes or i wont be able to take it anymore. I still feel like i am
dying inside. I have feeling like this. :\